Why stick to it…

if I’m not even doing it!

That’s hardly considered sticking to it, right?  As you know, I’ve been working with the formally known as Slim (four) Life program.  (I’m changing the name here a bit because I was the 2nd top on a search engine when putting in that name and I don’t want to be thought of as talking badly about the company.)   It was a strict food list, proteins and some fruits and veg, very low carb – nothing in cans or boxes, and very low sodium.  It worked very well when I did it.  I’m happy to report I lost weight on this program and felt excellent!

However, it’s so restricted!  It was driving me nuts.  After a while, I started to just get tired of it and resentful of the restriction.  Many times people have chimed in and said things like, if it’s too restricted, it won’t work for you, consider trying something different.  I heard them. I was resentful, and I felt like a complete failure when I would eat anything not on my food list.  Feeling that was is SO uncool.

Anywho, the biggest reason I didn’t try any other eating plan was because of how much hubman and I invested in that program.  I didn’t want to let hubman down.  I didn’t want him to feel that I was quitting.  I have also joined and quit Weight Watchers like five time before, maybe more!  I’m sure WW would have worked for me, if I would have made WW work for me and worked with it, you know?  But I didn’t.  I had joined so many times, it was old and I didn’t even try.  That being said, the past couple of months, the idea that I could have what I wanted in reasonable portions – sounded mighty appealing.

Yesterday, as I decided to make better decisions, I had a good breakfast.  But around 10:30-11, I knew it was time to start planning what I would have for lunch before I got over hungry and inhaled every carb around.  I could’t find anything that I wanted to eat on plan, and I turned back into the walking stormcloud.  I decided to just go ahead and put aside the fact that hubman might be frustrated, and try to do points again.  Just experiment with them for a couple weeks.  Besides, I was eating completely off any plan – surely he’d feel my doing something was better than nothing!!

So, I ended up having a good day.  It was nice to feel I had a well balanced day and stayed “on track”, and wasn’t too deprived.  I do, however, now have to deal with that feeling of hunger, which is something I didn’t experience when I was on track properly with Slimgenics.  However, I just kept busy.  I’m not sure it was even hunger I was feeling, more of a gnawing – this is your time that you love to EAT!  haha.

I told hubman when he got home about my day.  I knew he was a apprehensive about it.  He asked, “Have you ever lost weight on WW?”  He knows I’ve lost weight on the other plan, so he just didn’t understand me.  But, what else can I do.  I know for sure I won’t stay on the other program right now in my life.  And surely doing something is better than nothing?  After doing the other program, I feel more secure in tryin WW again, and not feeling so restricted on it since now I really know what restriction is!

So yeah, that’s that.  I’m on day 2 of counting points.  So far, so good.  It’s nice to have one “good” day under my belt.  We’ll se how things go…

I don’t want to feel bad anymore for trying something different. I don’t want to feel guilty!  So I’m just gonna have to move forward and keep trying, and let hubman get over it and show him I can do it, show myself I can do it.  Day in and day out I was feeling like a failure and seriously, enough of all that.  It’s time to take action!